Why Motorcycles Are Better Than Women

• Your motorcycle doesn't get upset when you forget it's birthday.
• You don't have to talk to your motorcycle after you ride it.
• You can choke your motorcycle.
• Your motorcycle doesn't get mad when you ignore it for a month or so.
• Motorcycles don't get jealous if you come home with grease under your fingernails.
• Motorcycles don't snore.
• Your motorcycle won't wake you up at 3:00 AM and ask you if you love it.
• Your motorcycle won't leave you for another rider.
• You don't have to pay child support / alimony to an ex-motorcycle.
• If you say bad things to your motorcycles, you don't have to apologize before you can ride it again.
• If your motorcycle doesn't look good, you can paint it or get better parts.
• If your motorcycle goes flat, you can fix it.
• If your motorcycle is misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics to correct it.
• If your motorcycle is too loose, you can tighten it.
• If your motorcycle is too soft, you can get different shocks.
• If your motorcycle makes too much noise, you can buy a muffler.
• If your motorcycle smokes, you can do something about it.
• It's always OK to use tie downs on your motorcycle.
• Motorcycles always feel like going for a ride.
• Motorcycles don't care about how many other motorcycles you have ridden.
• Motorcycles don't care about how many other motorcycles you have.
• Motorcycles don't care if you are late.
• Motorcycles don't get pregnant.
• Motorcycles don't have parents.
• Motorcycles don't insult you if you are a bad rider.
• Motorcycles don't mind if you look at other motorcycles, or if you buy motorcycle magazines.
• Motorcycles don't whine unless something is really wrong.
• Motorcycles last longer.
• Motorcycles only need their fluids changed every 2,500 miles.
• Motorcycles' curves never sag.
• New Motorcycles must be asked for, and if you don't want to pay for them, you don't get them.
• When riding, you and your motorcycle both arrive at the same time.
• You can kick your motorcycle to wake it up.
• You can ride a motorcycle as long as you want and it won't get sore.
• You can ride a motorcycle any time of the month.
• You can share your motorcycle with your friends.
• You can't get diseases from a motorcycle you don't know very well.
• You don't have to be jealous of the guy that works on your motorcycle.
• You don't have to convince your motorcycle that you're a motorcyclist and that you think that motorcycles are equals.
• You don't have to deal with priests or blood-tests to register your motorcycle.
• You don't have to take a shower before riding your motorcycle.
• You only need to get a new chain or belt for your motorcycle when the old one is worn.
• Your motorcycle never wants a night out alone with the other motorcycles.
• Your parents don't remain in touch with your old motorcycle after you dump it.
• Your motorcycle doesn't care what you're wearing when you take it out.
• Wearing two fresh rubbers makes riding a bike more enjoyable.
• The rashes you get from motorcycles go away without those painful Penicillin shots.
• One gets in no trouble for storing disassembled pieces of the motorcycle in the basement.
• Disassembling the motorcycle is done out of pleasure rather than need.
• Motorcycles always sound pleasant.
• Unlike women fat motorcycles aren't cheap dates.