Fred Died

Fred died. So Lena went to the local paper to put a notice in the obituaries.

The gentleman at the counter, after offering his condolences, asked Lena what she would like to say about Fred.

Lena replied, "You just put 'Fred died.'"

The gentleman, somewhat perplexed, said, "That's it? Just 'Fred died?' Surely, there must be something more you'd like to say about Fred. If its money you're concerned about, the first five words are free. We must say something more."

So Lena pondered for a few minutes and finally said, "O.K. You put 'Fred died. Boat for sale."

Deep Sea Fishing

Bernie had never been on a deep sea fishing boat before, and he was now thinking it was the stupidest thing he'd ever done in his life. Who would ever have believed that seasickness could be this awful?

With every pitch and roll, Bernie wondered how he was going to survive the remaining two hours of the trip.

One of the deckhands came up to him and said, "Don't worry, young fella. Nobody ever died of seasickness."

"Oh noooo!!" Bernie wailed... "You've just taken away my last hope for relief!"

A Good Fishing Spot

Two friends rented a boat and went fishing in a lake.

The first day, they caught 30 fish. As they were preparing to go into shore, one man said to the other, "Let's mark this spot so we can come here again tomorrow."

The next day, when they were driving to rent the boat, the same guy said, "Did you mark that spot?"

His friend replied, "Yeah, I put a big 'X' on the bottom of the boat."

The first one said, "That was dumb! What if we don't get the same boat today?"

Passing On Knowledge

A father and son went fishing one day. After a couple hours out in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him. He asked his father, "How does this boat float?"

The father thought for a moment, then replied, "I don't rightly know, son."

The boy returned to his contemplation, then turned back to his father, "How do fish breath underwater?"

Once again the father replied, "Don't rightly know, son."

A little later the boy asked, "Why is the sky blue?"

Again, the father replied. "Don't rightly know, son."

Worried he was going to annoy his father, he says, "Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?"

"Of course not, son. If you don't ask questions... you'll never learn anything!"